“But now I have turned to Thee, my Lord, after being guilty of omissions and transgressions against my soul, apologetically, repentantly, broken heartedly, entreating earnestly for forgiveness, yieldingly confessing (to my guilt), as I can find no escape from that which was done by me and having no refuge to which I could turn except seeking Thy acceptance of my excuse and admitting me into the realm of Thy capacious mercy.
O Allah! Accept my apology and have pity on my intense sufferings and set me free from my heavy fetters (of evil deeds).
My Nourisher! Have mercy on the infirmity of my body, the delicacy of my skin and the brittleness of my bones.
O’ Thou! Who originated my creation and (accorded me) my individuality, and (ensured) my upbringing and welfare (and provided) my sustenance (I beg Thee) to restore Thy favours and blessings upon me as Thou didst in the beginning of my life.
O’ my God! My Master! My Lord! And my Nourisher! What! Wilt Thou see me punished with the fire kindled by Thee despite my belief in Thy unity? And despite the fact that my heart has been filled with (pure) knowledge of Thee and when my tongue has repeatedly praised Thee and my conscience has acknowledged Thy love and despite my sincere confessions (of my sins) and my humble entreaties submissively made to Thy divinity?
Nay, Thou art far too kind and generous to torment one whom thyself nourished and supported, or to drive away from Thyself one whom Thou has kept under Thy protection, or to scare away one whom Thy self hast given shelter, or to abandon in affliction one Thou hast maintained and to whom Thou hast been merciful.
I wish I had known o’ my Master, my God and my Lord! Wilt Thou inflict fire upon faces which have submissively bowed in prostration to Thy greatness, or upon the tongues which have sincerely confirmed Thy unity and have always expressed gratitude to Thee, or upon hearts which have acknowledged Thy divinity with conviction, or upon the minds which accumulated so much knowledge of Thee until they became submissive to Thee, or upon the limbs which strove, at the places appointed for Thy worship, to adore Thee willingly and seek Thy forgiveness submissively?
Such sort (of harshness) is not expected from Thee as it is remote from Thy grace, O’ Generous One!
O’ Lord! Thou art aware of my weakness to bear even a minor affliction of this world and its consequence and adversity affecting the denizen of this earth, although such afflictions are momentary, short-lived and transient.
How then can I bear the retributions and the punishments of the hereafter which are enormous and of intensive sufferings, of prolonged period and perpetual duration, and which shall never be alleviated for those who deserve the same as those retributions will be the result of Thy wrath; and Thy punishment which neither the heavens nor the earth can withstand and bear!
My Lord! How can I, a weak, insignificant, humble, poor and destitute creature of Thine be able to bear them?
O’ my God! My Lord! My King! And Master! Which of the matters shall I complain to Thee and for which of them shall I bewail and weep?
Shall I bewail for the pains and pangs of the punishment and their intensity or for the length of sufferings and their duration?
Therefore (my Lord!) If Thou wilt subject me to the penalties (of hell) in company of Thy enemies and cast me with those who merited Thy punishments and tear me apart from Thy friends and those who will be near to Thee, then my God, my Lord and my Master, though I may patiently bear Thy punishments, how can I endure separation from Thee?
If I may be able to patiently endure the scorching fire of Thy hell, yet how can I endure not gazing upon Thy generosity? How can I remain in the fire while I have hopes of Thy forgiveness?
O’ my Lord! By Thy honour truly do I swear that, if Thou wilt allow my power of speech to be retained by me in the hell, I shall amongst its inmates cry out bewailingly unto Thee like the cry of those who have faith in Thy kindness and compassion.
And I shall bemoan for Thee (for being deprived of nearness to Thee) the lamentation of those who are bereaved, and I shall keep on calling unto Thee:
“Where art Thou O’ Friend of the believers! [Ya Waliyal Momineen]
O’ (Thou who art) the last resort and the ultimate goal of those who acknowledge Thee [Ya Ghayata Aamalil 'Aarefeen];
O’ Thou who art the helper of those seeking help! [Ya Ghiyathal Mustaghetheen]
O’ Thou who art dear to the hearts of those who truly believe in Thee! [Ya Habiba Quloobis Sadeqeen]
And O’ Thou who art the Lord of the universe [Ya Ilahal 'Aalameen].”
My Lord! Glory and praise be to Thee, wouldst Thou (wish) to be seen (disregarding) the voice of Thy slave, incarcerated therein (the hell) for his disobedience and imprisoned within its pits for his evildoings and misdeeds, crying out to Thee the utterance of one who has faith in Thy mercy and calling out to Thee in the language of those who believe in Thy Tawheed [the One, the Creator, the Nourisher, the Accomplisher, and the Protector of the entire existence] and seeking to approach Thee by means of Thy Lordship?
My Lord! Then how could he remain in torments when he hopefully relies upon Thy past forbearance, compassion and mercy?
And how can the fire cause him suffering when he hopes for Thy grace and mercy and how can its roaring flames burn him when Thou hearest his voice and sees his plight? And how can he withstand its roaring flames when Thou knowest his frailness? And how can he be tossed about between its layers when Thou knowest his sincerity? And how can the guards of hell threaten him when he calls out to Thee?
“My Lord”, and how would Thou abandon him therein (the hell) when he has faith in Thy Grace to set him free?
Alas! That is not the concept (held by us) of Thee nor has Thy Grace such a reputation nor does it resemble that which Thou hast awarded by Thy kindness and generosity to those who believe in Thy Tawheed.
I definitely conclude that hadst Thou not ordained punishment for those who disbelieved in Thee, and hadst Thou not decreed Thy enemies to remain in hell, Thou wouldst have made the hell cold and peaceful and there would never have been an abode or place for any one in it; but sanctified be Thy Names, Thou hast sworn to fill the hell with the disbelievers from amongst the jinns and hummankind together and to place forever Thy enemies therein.
And Thou, exalted be Thy praises, hadst made manifest, out of Thy generosity and kindness, that ‘the one who has submitted is not equal to the one who has not.’
My Lord! My Master! I, therefore implore Thee by that power which Thou determineth and by the decree which Thou hast finalised and ordained whereby Thou hath prevailed upon whom Thou hast imposed it, to bestow upon me this night and this very hour the forgiveness for all the transgressions that I have been guilty of, for all the sins that I have committed, for all the loathsome acts that I have kept secret and for all the evils done by me, secretly or openly, in concealment or outwardly and for every evil action that Thou hast ordered the two noble scribes to confirm whom Thou hast appointed to record all my actions and to be witnesses over me along with the limbs of my body, whilst Thou observeth over me besides them and wast witness to those acts concealed from them? Which Thou in Thy mercy hast kept secret and through Thy kindness unexposed.
And I pray to Thee to make my share plentiful in all the good that Thou dost bestow; in all the favours that Thou dost grant; and in all the virtues that Thou dost allow to be known everywhere; and in all the sustenance and livelihood that Thou dost expand and in respect of all the sins that Thou dost forgive and the wrongs that Thou dost cover up.
O’ Lord! O’ Lord! O’ Lord! O’ my God! My Lord! My Master! O’ Owner of my existence! O’ Thou who holdeth my destiny and who art aware of my suffering and poverty, O’ Thou who knoweth my destitution and starvation, o’ my Lord! O’ Lord, o’ Lord!
I beseech Thee by Thy glory and Thy honour, by Thy supremely high attributes and by Thy names to cause me to utilise my time, day and night, in Thy remembrance, by engaging myself in serving Thee (Thy cause) and to let my deeds be such as to be acceptable to Thee, so much so that all my actions and offerings (prayers) may be transformed into one continuous and sustained effort and my life may take the form of constant and perpetual service to Thee [wird'un waahida=unified litany].
O’ my Master! O’ Thou upon Whom I rely! O’ Thou unto Whom I express my distress! O’ my Lord! My Lord! My Lord! Strengthen my limbs for Thy service and sustain the strength of my hands to persevere in Thy service and bestow upon me the eagerness to fear Thee [Khash-yatik - internalizing His Presence in the heart] and unceasing continuity to serve Thee.
So that I may lead myself towards Thee in the field with those who are in the fore-rank and be swift towards Thee among those who hasten towards Thee and urge eagerly to be near Thee and draw myself towards Thee like them who sincerely draw themselves towards Thee and to fear Thee like the fear of those who believe firmly in Thee and thus I may join the congregation of the faithful congregated near Thee (for protection).”
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